Here I am. This is me.
I’m impatient. I over think everything. I enjoy time alone. But I also love connecting with people.
Food is the way to my heart, always.
I’m intense, it takes a lot to handle me.
And I can’t change that.
I get bored easily. The people in my life are ever changing and hilarious.
I don’t hide who I am, I don’t know how to hold back.
I put myself out there because life is too short to not take chances.
Take me as I am.
I wish there were more people I could be myself around. I put up this wall, I don’t know why, but only a few people can truly rip it down. I’ve known people for years and I still don’t feel comfortable around. I know its me. People must think I’m weird. I just don’t know how to interact with people. I don’t know how to get close to people. I treasure the people who I am myself with, but why I can’t I be open with everyone? I wish I knew, I wish I could change it.
I am becoming everything I’ve always hated. I am doing things I judged people for doing. I am doing everything I frowned down upon. Did I just not know what it felt like? Did I never know what it felt like to be alone and heartbroken? I never thought of it as a coping mechanism. I never understood why anyone would be like this. Until I became everything I hated. Its how I feel good about myself, it makes me happy. But only in the moment. Afterwards, or even before, I know its not what I want. I cannot stop myself. I’m everything I never wanted to be. I’ve tried to change. I’ve tried to go back. This isn’t me. This isn’t me. Why can’t I stop? God I sound like a drug addict. I’m not. My morals have just been completely readjusted over a matter of a few months. Who am I anymore?
I’m opinionated. I have a lot to say. I have a blog for heaven’s sake. I’ll tell you what I think and I couldn’t care less if you agree or not. I’m outspoken and I can be obnoxious when I’m hyper. I like to have fun. If you don’t agree with me and the way I live my life, fine. I don’t care how other people live their lives, so why would I care what you think about how I live mine? You have no right to get pissed at me for being myself and sharing my opinion. I never said you had to agree with me, I don’t even expect you to. You are who you are and I am who I am. We are two different people, why are you getting mad at me for thinking differently than you? I think life is beautiful and I want to take advantage of every moment of it. You can live however you want, but don’t you dare tell me how to live my life. I’m not apologizing this time, I swallowed my pride for you too many times already. You’ve never been a good friend to me and you’re just not worth it to me anymore