End.

 

This line in this song couldn’t agree more with what I’ve been thinking. I lost faith in love recently. It didn’t work for me. The perfect guy wasn’t perfect for me. I thought if we couldn’t make love work, how could I make it work with anybody? Then I realized something. Our love never ended. It will never end. A part of me will love him for the rest of my life. What I felt and I learned from that relationship is everything. It didn’t last forever. Just because it didn’t work with him, doesn’t mean it won’t work with anyone. I lost my faith in love, but I’ve seen it. I see it when my dad looks at my mom. I see it when my brother talks about his girlfriend. I see it in everyday life. Love is real. Love is beautiful. It doesn’t matter that my relationship didn’t last. I’ll find someone. I’ll find love. I’ve always been a firm believer. I can’t believe I had such a doubt for such a long time. I still believe in the beauty of being alone. But the beauty of love, that is above all else.

Two Different Lives.

“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” -Wayne Dyer

I think its crazy how different my life is now than it was just a few months ago. Oh how cliché I sound. I literally woke up one day and everything had changed. I used to be the homebody who sat in my dorm and studied. I would usually go home on the weekends, and when I didn’t I stayed in, most of the time by myself. I was happy in some aspects but my social life at school was almost non-existent except for my roommates. Now I’m always busy. I’m either studying, going to meetings, doing things for my clubs, or being with my friends. I still enjoy my alone time though. I am enjoying the usual college night life.

I am happy. I was happy then too. How is that possible? How is it possible that I’ve live two totally different lives and have been happy in each? I feel as if I was an entirely different person then, I don’t even recognize myself anymore. Not in a bad way though. I’m always talking about change, I’ve had a lot recently. I just find it incredible that I can lead two different lives and love both of them and what they have brought me.

I’ve made choices that I never would have even thought about before. I look at life in an entirely new light.  A brighter light. I want something totally different out of life now. I’ve learned that happiness is not how you live your life, its how you feel about life. Everyday, you can choose to be happy.