Wow, its been so long since I’ve written. I’m blissfully happy in a relationship and quite frankly haven’t needed this blog to sort out my feelings. But I miss writing. I miss sitting down and having no idea what I’m going to say and just end up writing things I didn’t even know I felt. I want to make a come back.
This will probably be a whole lot different than how I wrote in the past. Getting over a break up and finding myself.
I am going to start my journey in the professional world. This time next week, I will have my first official day as a student teacher. Its probably the most exciting, nerve-wracking, incredible feeling I’ve ever had. I cannot believe its finally here. I’ve worked 3 1/2 years for this and its here. The beginning of my adult life is starting in a week.
I spend many parts of my days laying in bed browsing the internet. Searching for ways to entertain my otherwise spastic brain. I can’t even watch a TV show without play solitaire on my phone. I have grown up in such a world where I am always entertained by something. Kids younger than me are worse off, they started earlier. There is so much information and entertainment at our fingertips, we don’t know how to spend time alone. Sure I enjoy my time in my room by myself, but I’m constantly in contact with someone or on the world wide web.
I think thats one of my favorite parts of traveling. Obviously I love seeing where I am and experiencing everything the place has to offer. But something about being disconnected from the world, it really makes traveling a truly amazing experience.
I wish I had the ability to pull myself from technology more often. I’ve come far too dependent.
Its been bothering me that I haven’t had much to write about. I haven’t had the urge recently to pour out whatever is going on in my mind. But then I realized something. It is because I’m happy. Sure I had a very stressful week, but I didn’t need this blog to de-stress. I have found wonderful friends to do that, friends that listen and comfort and care. My blogs have always been my confusion, hurt, or anger. I’ve had some happy ones, but they are mostly me being optimistic about what I’m feeling and where I am going. I miss writing though. I guess I need to find a way to express my happiness through writing too.
I’m pretty stressed about my finals right now. I decided I needed to de-stress. After a few thoughts of unattainable ways to help my stress (and an attainable caramel hot chocolate later), I thought of blogging. No matter what I am feeling, writing always makes me feel better. Whether I’m upset or angry or confused, after I feel like so much weight has been lifted off my shoulders. To be honest, I usually have no idea what I am feeling before I start writing. A lot of the time I will start writing with one thought and end with a completely different one. I never really know what I am thinking until I type it out.
I know all my fellow bloggers and writers know exactly what I am talking about. Sometimes you just don’t know what you think or how you feel about something until you really sit down and let all your thoughts come out candidly. Just like a great song with a twist of faith in the last verse, sometimes when you talk yourself through something, you feel differently at the end than you did originally.
Since I started my blog, I have realized what really matters to me and what really doesn’t. I’ve learned that I have a pretty concrete writing style. But I think the most important thing is I’ve seen myself grow. Sometimes I look back on my old blogs. I was an angry and confused person when I started this blog. I started it to get all of that out and figure out what I wanted in life.
I never thought this would last this long. I never thought I’d fall in love with writing about my life and my feelings and my views. But I have.
This is my 50th post. My blog started almost four months ago. I have learned so much about myself and life and how much I’ve grown in these past few months.
I want to thank all of my faithful followers of wordpress and those people who click my links on facebook whenever I post them. I hope you enjoy reading my blog because I truly enjoy writing it and appreciate all those eyes who see it. I hope my words make you think, whether you agree or are completely appalled by what I say, I just hope that its made you sit and think too.
Let us be honest, that last post was boring and lame (so much so that I decided to delete it). I’m new to this whole blogging thing and I am not quite sure if I’m doing it for myself or if I’m writing because I want the world-wide web to enjoy and hear what I have to say.
Considering the amount of times a day I have been checking my stats and notifications, I’d say I really want to let the world hear my thoughts. I like the idea of someone on the other side of the country reading what I have to say and having an opinion on it. Obviously not everyone is going to agree with what I say, especially in things like my politics post. Just to know a few people sat down and took the time to read it, like it, or post on it, that’s so amazing to me.
I’m still learning what I want to write about and why. That’s why I have such a wide range of topics and formality in my writing. To be honest, I have never and will never consider myself a writer. That also makes this whole blog thing a little complicated. I want to spark the interests of people’s mind and I’m sure going on and on about this isn’t it.
So if you could, please comment on this blog and let me know what you think is the most interesting things to write about. I will definitely only write on things I feel I have knowledge in, but I’d love to hear ideas from people on what they enjoy reading people’s thoughts and opinions about.
Thank you for reading and helping me establish my blogging journey.